多些勇气,为了自己

灵感电波 #49

多些勇气,为了自己
Photo by Michael Dziedzic / Unsplash

Hi,又见面啦!

每周我都会从上百份书摘、文章、播客和社交媒体中精选最有价值的内容,只为呈现五个点亮生活的绝妙灵感。

本周不算顺利,于是浏览我的素材库找点内容激励自己,恰逢奥运时节,正好也把这些内容分享给你。

主题叫勇气。


I

Productivity is most important for things you don't want to be doing. Most people want to increase productivity so they can spend less time on the task.
But before you worry about being more productive, think about being more selective. Rather than focusing on increasing productivity, it may be worth asking, "What would I be delighted to spend time on, even if it went slowly?"
Direct your energy toward figuring out how to start what you want to do rather than thinking about how to shorten what you don't want to do.

提高生产力对你不想做的事情最为重要。大多数人想要提高生产力,是为了能在任务上花更少的时间。但在你考虑如何更高效之前,不妨先思考一下如何更有选择性。与其专注于提高生产力,不如问问自己,‘什么事情即使进展缓慢,我也会乐于投入时间?
将你的精力放在如何开始你想做的事情上,而不是想着如何缩短你不想做的事情。

来源:詹姆斯·克利尔(James Clear)

狠狠共情这条,在不想做的事情上花费越多的时间,心情反而越糟。

每个人都应该花更多时间思考和寻找对自己真正重要的事。

我之前做过一个关于如何找到自己真正想做的事情的视频,正好想起来,如果感兴趣可以看一下:

如何找到自己真正想做的事

II

One of the great mistakes in life is suffering for years because you didn't want to feel foolish for five minutes.
• You don't want to apologize, so you let a relationship deteriorate.
• You're scared of the sting of rejection, so you don't ask for what you want.
• You fear people will say your idea is dumb, so you never start the business.
Nobody likes feeling foolish, but the feeling fades quickly. The willingness to endure five minutes of discomfort turns out to be a meaningful dividing line in life.

人生中一个巨大的错误就是因为不愿意感到五分钟的愚蠢,而让自己受苦多年。
- 你不愿意道歉,所以任由一段关系恶化。
- 你害怕被拒绝的刺痛,所以不敢去争取你想要的东西。
- 你担心别人会说你的想法很蠢,所以从未开始创业。
没有人喜欢感到愚蠢,但这种感觉很快就会消散。愿意忍受五分钟的不适,往往成为人生中一个有意义的分界线。

来源:詹姆斯·克利尔(James Clear)

很多人的梦想其实都是被自己毁掉的,最大的困难之一在于如何克服自己的恐惧。

回想当时自己开始做视频的时候,非常害怕网友的批评,于是做了非常多的心理建设,比如跟自己说「刚开始没人在乎你的,就算做的视频像坨屎又怎样?重要的是开始,以后慢慢就会变好的!」

如今已经轻车熟路,感谢当时的自己。

插播一句:最近分享了很多詹姆斯·克利尔(James Clear)的深刻洞察,他对人性的见解非常细腻和精准,附上他的简介,对他感兴趣的读者可以搜索他的更多文章来读:

詹姆斯·克利尔(James Clear)是一位专注于习惯、决策和持续进步的作家与演讲者。他的著作《原子习惯》(Atomic Habits)于2018年出版,迅速成为畅销书,广受好评。书中探讨了如何通过微小的日常改变来实现显著的成果,强调了习惯的累积效应和系统化的行为改变方法。

克利尔在高中时经历了一次严重的运动伤害,这一事件促使他深入研究习惯的形成与改变。经过多年的努力,他不仅在体育上取得了成功,还获得了学业上的成就,成为大学的最佳男性运动员,并入选全美明星阵容。他的个人经历和对习惯的深刻理解使他成为该领域的权威。

此外,克利尔的文章常见于《纽约时报》、《时代杂志》等知名媒体,他的电子报也吸引了数十万订阅者。他创立的“习惯学苑”(The Habits Academy)为希望改善习惯的个人和团队提供培训,广受欢迎。

III

Perfection is impossible. In the 1526 singles matches I played in my career, I won almost 80% of those matches. Now, I have a question for you.
What percentage of points do you think I won in those matches? Only 54%.
In other words, even top-ranked tennis players win barely more than half of the points they play. When you lose every second point on average, you learn not to dwell on every shot.

You teach yourself to think, okay, I double-faulted ... it's only a point. Okay, I came to the net, then I got passed again; it's only a point. Even a great shot, an overhead backhand smash that ends up on ESPN's top 10 playlist. That, too, is just a point.

And here's why I'm telling you this. When you're playing a point, it has to be the most important thing in the world, and it is. But when it's behind you, It's behind you. This mindset is really crucial because it frees you to fully commit to the next point and the next point after that, with intensity, clarity, and focus.

You want to become a master at overcoming hard moments. That is, to me, the sign of a champion. The best in the world are not the best because they win every point. It's because they lose again and again and have learned how to deal with it. You accept it. Cry it out if you need to and force a smile.

完美是无法实现的。在我职业生涯中参加的1526场单打比赛中,我赢得了其中将近80%的比赛。现在,我想问你一个问题。你认为我在这些比赛中赢得了多少比例的得分?只有54%。
换句话说,即使是排名靠前的网球选手,他们也仅仅赢得了一半多一点的得分。当你平均每两个球就输一个时,你会学会不去纠结每一个回合。

你会教自己这样想,好吧,我双误了……这只是一个得分。好吧,我上网了,但又被穿越得分了;这也只是一个得分。即使是一个很棒的击球,一个能上ESPN十大精彩时刻的高压反手扣杀,也不过是一个得分。

我告诉你这些的原因是:当你在打一个回合时,它必须是世界上最重要的事情,而且确实如此。但当它结束后,它就结束了。这种心态非常关键,因为它能让你完全投入到下一个回合,之后的每一个回合,都充满激情、清晰度和专注力。

你想成为克服困难时刻的大师。对我来说,这才是冠军的标志。世界上最优秀的人并不是因为他们赢得了每一个回合,而是因为他们一次又一次地失败,并且学会了如何应对。你接受它。如果需要,可以哭一场,然后强颜欢笑。”

来源:罗杰·费德勒,2024年在达特茅斯毕业典礼上的一次精彩的毕业演讲(点击观看完整视频

费德勒是我最喜欢的网球选手,他的这段话也是如何面对困难的最真诚的答案。

IV

And once the storm is over, you won't remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won't even be sure whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm, you won't be the same person who walked in. That's what this storm's all about.

当风暴过去后,你不会记得自己是如何挺过来的,如何设法生存下来。你甚至不会确定风暴是否真的结束了。但有一件事是确定的。当你走出风暴时,你将不再是进入风暴时的那个人。这就是这场风暴的意义所在。

来源:村上春树,《海边的卡夫卡》

这是村上春树对于挑战如何塑造我们的看法,每一段经历都会塑造我们,但是因为恐惧而躲避和因为热爱而勇敢这两种经历塑造的结果一定不同,请慎重选择。

V

Those who lack the courage will always find a philosophy to justify it.

缺乏勇气的人总会找到一种哲学来为之辩解。

来源:阿尔贝·加缪(哲学家兼作家),《加缪手记,1942-1951》

哲学家总是能一针见血地指出人性中的弱点。

生活从来没有容易过,祝福我们都能少些借口,多些勇气,为了我们自己。


祝你有美好的一周!

董双赫

Subscribe to 灵感电波

Don’t miss out on the latest issues. Sign up now to get access to the library of members-only issues.
jamie@example.com
Subscribe